Imposter Syndrome and all
Why is it so damn hard to write about myself?
Probably because I care too much what you think.
I’ve been writing stories since I can remember. In elementary school, my favorite assignment was always the writing prompt. When the teacher would put up the wacky hand-drawn transparency on the projector, my little mind would wander into all the different stories that could come out of one simple drawing.
Stories — and more importantly — storytelling has always interested me. Sometimes to a fault, as a memoirist and essayist, I’m regularly searching for the arc in my life that is…
Older men seem to think I need validation from them.
I just had an informational interview that went well. Until it didn’t.
Both I and the owner of a local agency in Austin agreed to have a coffee and discuss a position that needed to be filled. He had reached out to me via LinkedIn. Even though I am succeeding as a self-employed content strategist, I agreed to meet. You lose 100% of the opportunities you don’t take. Right?
Anyway. The interview went well. We discussed digital marketing. And content analysis. And my comfortability with project management. All the things people normally talk about in a traditional job interview.
Then…
Who in HR can I speak to about this shitty vacation policy?
I’m tired and I don’t know how much more I can handle.
My daughter turned 10-months yesterday. And I know I have a lot more — err — development to come. The toddler years. The big emotions. The screaming in grocery stores. The first day of school. The bratty years. I know all of that is going to come, and yet, somehow, through all this knowledge and intellectual understanding, my lizard brain is signaling that it’s all too fucking much.
I’m scared. How can I possibly hold more space than I’m holding right now? How can I possibly add more…
There’s no quick way to do it. You have to put in the work.
Eight years ago I was working as a barista in a local coffee shop on the Jersey Shore. My film degree from a really expensive art school was collecting dust and definitely not earning its proper return on investment. I had no idea what I was going to do with my life.
One night, while scrolling through LinkedIn and the endless lists of jobs I didn’t want, I found a position in Austin, TX that seemed exciting. It was for a Social Media Intern for Amy Poehler’s Smart Girls. Unpaid, of course.
I applied immediately. I got a callback and…
She’s only 10-months old, but I already feel guilty.
I was sitting around the dining room table with my husband, my parents, and my mother-in-law. They were sharing funny stories of how they’d been punished by their parents in the past and how they’d punish us — their children — as well.
“She’d beat the hell of out me.” They all laughed.
“I pinched my kids.” “Me too, me too!” More laughter.
I walked away, I didn’t know who’s child that was! And some more laughter.
As I sat there, laughing with them I started to think of how I’d punish my daughter. While I know the day will…
Freelancers have a love-hate relationship with Upwork
Upwork isn’t for everyone.
A lot of articles about How to Make It as a Freelancer bash Upwork. I understand why freelancers wouldn’t really like the platform. They charge a whopping 20% fee on the contract agreement for the newbie freelancer. Which is hefty, and painful when it comes out of your earnings.
But the truth is, for folks who weren’t in the client business before their freelance career, getting exposure to quality clients is hard, time-consuming, and often a gamble. Cold emails only go so far. No matter which way you slice it, you have to put some sort…
Jersey Girl moves to Texas, y’all
I never wanted to move to the south. I was an art student in NYC. I grew up in New Jersey, a very blue state. I never wanted to live in a red state, let alone the ruby-red Lone Star State.
I’ve lived in Texas for nearly eight years. In eight years, I’ve learned a lot about the nuances of Texas culture. I learned that Evangelical crazies definitely exist. But I also learned that there are Liberal Christians. And Liberal Texans. And anti-gun people. And gun-loving people. The media’s image of pasta-sauce-red Texas isn’t the whole picture. …
SALARY HISTORY
$55,000 per year is all I thought I was worth
I was in a wine bar eating a fancy s’mores-inspired dessert, paid in part by Groupon when I received my first paid marketing job. Sure, I had been in the industry on and off as an intern, working long hours for free or school credits. But I couldn’t afford that for long, because of rent and bills and food. Plus all of that work didn’t equate to real experience anyway.
So when I received the “Congratulations, we’d like to offer you…” email, I thought I had made it. I was 25, working as a barista at two cafes when I…
Succeeding and growing as a freelance writer was more about self-worth than I thought.
I never believed in myself. I never celebrated my achievements. Not really anyway. Sure, I had graduation parties, and I would have a celebratory happy hour when I landed a job, but I never truly stopped to appreciate the hard work I had done. As soon as some success or achievement happened in my life, instead of sitting in the moment of pride, I would quickly jump to but what’s next?
This lack of reflection led me down a path of seeking constant approval from anyone who would give it. It showed up in weird places. It showed up in…
Stop telling women we’ll have more sex when we feel sexy.
When a group of friends found out how often my husband and I have sex they seemed to pity us. Unlike us, none of them were parents — especially new parents. None of them really understood the hormone roller coaster women go through to bring a child into this world.
The attention is always on our bodies. Whether or not I’m healed had little to do with my desire to have sex. But because I was medically cleared for sex, it must be me who had the problem, not my body.
The funny thing is though, I’m not separate from…
